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# To Find Success, You Must First Pass Through Difficulty. The Reasons Why.
- URL: https://dialogues.bluedobiedev.com/to-find-success-you-must-first-pass-through-difficulty-the-reasons-why/
- Published: 2024-04-24T16:35:25.000Z
- Updated: 2026-09-26T06:11:28.000Z
- Description: Explore how true growth and success stem from overcoming hardships and difficulties.
- Author: Melanie Brown
- Tags: #Migrated-1790402887129, #Import 2026-09-26 01:08, Capacity-Aware Design

Explore how true growth and success stem from overcoming hardships and difficulties.

What is the main goal for most people? To find success. Success at work, success in life, success in love are all goals that most people have. According to DreamMaker, 85% of people achieve success in their lives. The study by the University of Maryland surveyed a group of adults aged 18–24 and asked about their current success level. ([21 Success Statistics and Trends You Need To Know in 2023 (dreammakerr.com)](https://dreammakerr.com/success-statistics/?ref=dialogues.bluedobiedev.com))

Of course, this wish for success is natural, as most people hope to avoid failure or struggle. However, what most people don’t stop and realize is that true success, true growth comes only after they have experienced true hardship or difficulty and had to work through that. DreamMaker states that approximately 80 % of personal success is attributed to hard work and dedication, while the remaining 20 % results from luck or timing. ([21 Success Statistics and Trends You Need To Know in 2023 (dreammakerr.com)](https://dreammakerr.com/success-statistics/?ref=dialogues.bluedobiedev.com)) This hard work and dedication can be found in the midst of struggle.

First, we will discover that growth is on the other side of struggle by looking at two examples of this concept. We will then look at how inner strength is found by going through hardships. Finally, we will examine two personal examples of how confidence can spring from difficulty, which can lead to taking steps you would not have taken before. We will explore why these concepts are true and hopefully learn to embrace the lessons that hardship and difficulty teach us.

### Growth is on the other side of struggle.

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/dd/8c/dd8c6068-a0b4-49cd-819f-252b3802843e/content/images/2026/09/1-ir314fn7ykcrbtr77eofqw.png)

Growth: in many people, only found through facing hardships.

One example of this is a person that has gone through a bad relationship. In the beginning of the relationship, things seem wonderful. Then, as time goes by and the relationship loses its newness, communication begins to fail and two people that were once so close become little more than strangers. They become roommates, rather than partners in the relationship. Sometimes, things are said that cannot be taken back. The struggle is throughout the relationship and the breakup can be hard as well. However, beyond that, if they have learned lessons from the difficulty, like how not to lose communication with the one they care for, they may find a person that truly makes them happy and helps them feel complete. This is only because of the growth they experienced by battling through the hard times.

An example of this in business is the company that starts off strong and gains instant confidence. Once the newness of the business wears off, then sales drop off. This company may get discouraged and find things to be more difficult than they were when they were first motivated. However, by sticking with it, maintaining the basics even when it is difficult, and finding new ways to innovate through growing, this company may find they can gather new sales. So, again, an example of growth by going through hard times.

### Without struggle, inner strength is not found.

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/dd/8c/dd8c6068-a0b4-49cd-819f-252b3802843e/content/images/2026/09/1-utujgy37tpamrpt5fn0ovg.png)

Trees facing an onslaught from a hurricane.

Sometimes the development of strength comes about because of going through trials. The best example of this concept that I can find is how tree trunks and roots can develop strength and flexibility by passing through storms where winds will batter and bend them. In an article by ELI (Entrepreneurial Learning Initiative), we find the following: “Watch an old, strong tree in the wind the next time it storms. It sways and bends with the wind, remaining in flow with the energy around it. While the wind, at times, has the power to upend a tree, one that has gone through many storms will likely withstand many more, for its roots are deep and strong. The metaphor here is that to grow deeply, we cannot hide in a dome; we must live in the world around us.” ([“Strong Winds Strong Roots: What Trees Teach Us About Life” — ELI Mindset](https://elimindset.com/resource/strong-winds-strong-roots-what-trees-teach-us-about-life/?ref=dialogues.bluedobiedev.com))

Something that rings true to me is that the tree remains in flow with the energy around it. We, also, must remain in flow with the energy around us. We must allow our roots to grow deep by taking in our experiences, both positive and negative, and continuing to grow from them. This is what allows us to develop innate strength that will carry us through other experiences.

### Confidence can spring from difficulty, which can lead to taking steps you would not have taken before.

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/dd/8c/dd8c6068-a0b4-49cd-819f-252b3802843e/content/images/2026/09/1-olz__fenfc4d7ixmv8gfkg.png)

My bio dad and myself around 2016

This example is very personal to me. I am adopted. I found my biological parents several years ago and was able to build a relationship with my biological father. Life came and went, and there were times that we were not able to get in touch with each other. However, in January of this year, he passed away. I was so glad that I was able to find closure with him before he passed away. Part of that closure was him telling me to do what I love.

I will never get the time back that I missed with him. However, I truly treasure the times that I had. He was a good man, and an inspiration to me. He wanted me to do the things that I love and that make me happy. As a result of that, when he passed, I was inspired to start my web design business, Bluedobie Developing. ([https://www.bluedobiedev.com](https://www.bluedobiedev.com/?ref=dialogues.bluedobiedev.com)) And because of the hardships faced due to his passing, I found the confidence to put that plan into motion.

During this same period, my adoptive father’s dementia progressively has gotten worse. I knew that by starting my own business, I could stay here in Kentucky and work while helping to care for him. Life’s difficulties led to growth and confidence in my ability to do something worthwhile.

Watching the man that my father was disappear and become someone else has been hard. I love him and would do anything for him, but it is hard knowing that there are times he doesn’t even necessarily know who I am. He knows I love him; he knows I am here for him, but I don’t know that he always knows that I am his daughter. But what he does know is that I have pulled myself up by my bootstraps and I build websites, which is something I love.

He may not remember that I got my passion for computers from him, but he knows I am happy, which is all I can ask. Because of the difficulties I have faced in this journey with his dementia, I have learned I can manage helping care for him while I start my own journey in the web design business.

Now that we have looked at how growth comes from struggle, we can understand that although times are not always good, we can learn and grow from those times to have better experiences ahead. We have also discussed how strength can come from difficult times. Like the example of the tree that develops its strength from the storms and the winds, we find that our strength can be borne of struggle as well. And finally, we discovered how confidence can spring from difficulty. We may not know what we are capable of until we are forced to experience it and step up. These experiences can cause a growth in confidence to find that we are capable, we can handle whatever life throws our way. The overarching lesson here: don’t get hung up in the stressful, difficult times; instead, learn and grow from these times so that you can succeed later.